Author Archives: Doiggus Khan

About Doiggus Khan

Tom Doig is a writer, performer, editor and moron. Tom has been published in The Big Issue, Maxim and Voiceworks. His plays include "Survival of the Prettiest", "Hitlerhoff" and "Selling Ice to the Remains of the Eskimos". He has an MA in Hitler Comedy and is currently writing a PhD about climate change. "Mörön to Mörön: two men, two bikes, one Mongolian misadventure" is Tom's first book.

Day Seven – Naadam

We have missed the first day of the Naadam festival, which included the preliminary rounds of Böhk – where anyone can compete, and seven-year-olds wrestle burly champions. That could’ve been me and Tama, should’ve been me and Tama, and our … Continue reading

Posted in Amazing Landscapes, Drunk, Feats of Stength, Friendly Locals, Mongolia, Shonky, Stupid Tourists, Terrific Crap Trinkets, Travel, Unitard, Unnecessary Feats of Stength, Vodka | Leave a comment

Day Six – Moron to Khatgal

(Or, Doig and Pugs Versus Wild) A few photos from our camp site just out of Moron (the night before). (95kms of crazed cycling goes here) Over-friendly peasant at grocery store – tries to get us to have a few … Continue reading

Posted in Amazing Landscapes, Beer, Dirty Scamming Beasts, Friendly Locals, Over Friendly Locals, Shonky, Stupid Tourists, Travel, Unnecessary Feats of Stength | Leave a comment

Day Five – worst bus ride of my life (continued); Moron doesn’t fail to disappoint

In the morning I nod off and headbutt the Mongol in front of me. He laughs about it, we both laugh about it. Tama ocky straps me to the bus seat, across my chest. I manage to sleep for twenty … Continue reading

Posted in Amazing Landscapes, Beer, Cycling, Dirty Scamming Beasts, Drunk, Dusty Badness, Mongolia, Moron, Over Friendly Locals, Peasants, Shonky, Stupid Tourists, Vodka | 1 Comment

Day Four (cont.) – worst bus ride of my life

We rock up to the Dragon Centre Bus Station nearly two hours before the bus is scheduled to leave, with our patched-up bike boxes and our three disintegrating canvas bags. Doesn’t take too long to find the bus to Xobcron, … Continue reading

Posted in Amazing Landscapes, Cycling, Dirty Scamming Beasts, Dusty Badness, Eurotrash, Feats of Stength, Friendly Locals, Khovsgol, Mongolia, Moron, Peasants, Shonky, Travel, UlaanBaatar | 2 Comments

Day Four – UlaanBaltimore to Moron

all right! A quick post, as we’re about to jump a van to the Dragon Centre bus station in west Ulaan Baatar – providing it turns up. We have four tickets for the two us us, an insurance policy against … Continue reading

Posted in Amazing Landscapes, Cycling, Dirty Scamming Beasts, Eurotrash, Feats of Stength, Friendly Locals, Kind of like The Wire, Mongolia, Monopolising Free Hostel Internet, Moron, Over Friendly Locals, Peasants, Shonky, Stupid Tourists, Taxi Hell, Terrific Crap Trinkets, Travel, UlaanBaatar, Vodka | 1 Comment

Day Two – Somewhere in Mongolia

Waking up bleary but somewhat refreshed, I step into the train corridor and look out the window at – nothing. Nothing much of anything. Patchy grass and scrub in bleached-out greens blends with the sandy yellow and light brown of … Continue reading

Posted in Amazing Landscapes, Beer, Bubonic Plague, Diazepam, Dirty Scamming Beasts, Drunk, Dusty Badness, Eurotrash, Explosive Diarrhea, Feats of Stength, Friendly Locals, Holy Fucking What?, Khovsgol, Kind of like The Wire, Mongolia, Over Friendly Locals, Peasants, Shonky, Travel, Unnecessary Feats of Stength | Leave a comment

Day One – Beijing Train Station

Sleepless night – excitement, nerves, mosquitoes. 5.30am alarm: time to get our shit to the train station! Standing out on the main road behind our hostel with our mountain of luggage, which takes three shuttle runs to get it all … Continue reading

Posted in Amazing Landscapes, Beer, China, Cycling, Diazepam, Dirty Scamming Beasts, Drunk, Dusty Badness, Eurotrash, Explosive Diarrhea, Feats of Stength, Friendly Locals, Holy Fucking What?, Kind of like The Wire, Mongolia, Monopolising Free Hostel Internet, Over Friendly Locals, Peasants, Shonky, Stupid Tourists, Taxi Hell, Travel, Uncategorized, Unnecessary Feats of Stength | 2 Comments

Day Zero – Beijing

Big day racing around Beijing, doing last-minute errands. Finish packing around 11pm. Our stuff: three big cheap stripey bags, one zip already broken, crammed full of our otherwise expensive-looking and numerous panniers and miscellany. We have lots of sensible cycling … Continue reading

Posted in Beer, China, Cycling, Dirty Scamming Beasts, Drunk, Eurotrash, Explosive Diarrhea, Friendly Locals, Kind of like The Wire, Monopolising Free Hostel Internet, Peasants, Shonky, Stupid Tourists, Taxi Hell, Terrific Crap Trinkets, Travel, Unitard, Unnecessary Feats of Stength | 3 Comments