Our Rest Day …

… begins at the Crack of 8am, when industrial jackhammers open up on the construction site located conveniently next to our window. I throw my shoes at the workers to shut them up, but they just throw them back, so I go back to not-quite-sleep. My whole body throbs, slowly but steadily, with exhaustion.

A leisurely café breakfast of eggs and “bread” and about four grams of almost-sausage is followed immediately by a big dirty meatlovers pizza down the road. Tama has found a swimming pool and sauna in the guidebook, located in this great commie slab of a “Sports Palace”, with some great old musty sports trophies and horse-wrestling carpet frescoes, so we flag the swimming and proceed directly to the sitting around sweating bit. We have the place to ourselves, but resist the urge to go commando. It’s good to sweat without exercising for a change, and great to stretch those poor old suffering leg muscles out.

After a bit of an afternoon nap / collapse, we itinerise the remainder of the trip – coming up with a punishing schedule of 12 consecutive days riding, no rest days, and at least two nights camping out somewhere trackless and wild as we try to bush-bush 30-odd k’s into and out of Terelj National Park without cutting south through Ulaan Baatar. If everything goes to plan – Mongolian shortcuts included – we will make it to the east Mörön (near Ondorkhaan) by the night of 3 August, and make our connecting flight out of the country a couple of days later. Rugged. Daunting. Not. Fun. After a prolonged blogging session in Internerenet, PCs frustrating in their sluggishness, we walk slowly back to our twin room. And as we fall towards sleep, Tama says: “There’s no real reason why we can’t go through Ulaan Baatar. I know we said we weren’t going to, but … sheeeeit …”

So we decide it’s not cheating to go through UB – and even have a rest day! It’s not quite as wild, but it’s still bloody Mongolia, and it’s still Mörön to Mörön.

Right?

About Doiggus Khan

Tom Doig is a writer, performer, editor and moron. Tom has been published in The Big Issue, Maxim and Voiceworks. His plays include "Survival of the Prettiest", "Hitlerhoff" and "Selling Ice to the Remains of the Eskimos". He has an MA in Hitler Comedy and is currently writing a PhD about climate change. "Mörön to Mörön: two men, two bikes, one Mongolian misadventure" is Tom's first book.
This entry was posted in Amazing Landscapes, Cycling, Dirty Scamming Beasts, Monopolising Free Hostel Internet, Moron, Peasants, Shonky, Stupid Tourists, Travel, UlaanBaatar, Unnecessary Feats of Stength. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *